Slippery Slopes...

Several readers have reminded me that I have made no entry to the blog for several weeks. I am flattered that there are still people reading the thing, of course, and I feel an obligation to keep it up, but I am afraid my energy and my creativity is being increasingly absorbed by the realities and demands of my "old" life, to which I have returned full time. Additionally, I have been keeping a highly personal journal of my thoughts about and my observations of life, love, tragedy, beauty, nature and the human condition. This is therapeutic.
There are books, many books, about the healing power of keeping a written journal of one's life . I have found this to be true, and I write whenever and wherever I can.

The personal journal is invigorating. It is a form of release. And time spent keeping it is minimal.
What I find alarming is the all-consuming demand of my energy and of my thoughts at work. I titled this blog message "Slippery Slopes", because I feel the pull of gravity created by that demand on my personal resources. This is not where I want to be in my life at this time. What we do is not always what we are.
I have been fortunate to have been given an extension of the gift of life...to have been brought back from the abyss. I realize this more than ever. I want to think there is some higher purpose to my survival. Maybe an "angel" will reveal that purpose. But I think the real work is cut out for me.

I do appreciate those who continue to check the blog-site for my latest message.

Ishmael

Old E-Mails

While searching for an old e-mail to verify some issue of memory, I happened upon a group of messages dating back to mid-April. They were from various friends, acquaintances and family members expressing alarm, sorrow and concern about my heart surgery. Reading them again, some eighteen weeks later, touched me deeply. It was the first time I entirely sensed the impact of that event on the lives of so many people. I don't think of myself as some iconic symbol, but I am, in no particular order...... first born, first son, oldest brother, husband, father, uncle, nephew, in-law, boss, neighbor, customer, friend, godfather ...and so on. I can't think of anything else right now...........


I'm just me